looking in the mirror again, seeing what should i do in life?.. even though i live for money, but it's not gonna work well. i have no love for money, it's just another piece of paper to me. perhaps i let life work itself out, if there is fate.. perhaps he got a place for me in this hell hole.
it's depressing, i can even feel my soul crying and screaming inside out. such a failure. I really have to thank my mom for accepting such a failure son, fails in every way in aspect of life. still, if she has a choice of choosing a better son. i suppose she would choose others beside me.
previously i had a bad experience with friends before, which i have someone to comfort me, but i suppose i have to bite the bullet. i never had a best friend before.. used to have.. but that's a long story ago..
i guess i am a person that experience better through pain.. joy is a momentary feeling while pain and scars will be forever embedded in my memory. i can never accept failure, yet im one of them... i am a hypocrite.
is time to shut this feelings.. im really tired. beating my own self wont help anything, i guess is time to start my assignments.
-Sorry that i loved you-
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